


Shoulda Bought a V8

by Cleo



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Gen, Hiking, Humor, Post-Series, Theft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-04-09
Updated: 2008-04-09
Packaged: 2017-10-19 19:50:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/204587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cleo/pseuds/Cleo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xander educates someone about their evil ways with the aid of V8 juice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shoulda Bought a V8

**Author's Note:**

> This is dedicated to Sylum's bunny hound Faramir who came up with the idea. Thanks Faramir.

Why him why was it always him. All he'd had to do was pick up some bottles of V8 for the girls to drink in the morning. What? Was it the eye patch? Did the universe think that because of the loss he was easy pickings?

These thoughts and more went through Xander Harris' mind as he stared down the shaking gun barrel. He watched as the robber left the store and hopped into the beat up, old Toyota, piece of shit car the new Watcher's Council had got him. A few minutes later the cops showed up and after another half an hour of bullshit questions he started on the two-mile trudge back to the house with his purchases of V8.

He'd been a block away from the house when he saw someone pushing a car near the side of the road. As he got closer he saw that it was his car being pushed which meant it must have been the robber trying to move it somewhere he could ditch it. Slowly he snuck up behind the guy and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey, remember me?" Xander punched the guy before he could respond. When the guy started to reach for what may have been his gun he swung the bag of V8 towards his head. The glass bottles connected with his side stopping him from reaching whatever he was going for. Xander kept swinging the bag, mumbling with each contact the bottles made with flesh.

"Target the one eyed guy, will ya? Not an easy target now, huh? And what's with the taking of the Xandermobile?" With his final swing, which knocked the guy out, he said, "But thanks for letting me know that I shoulda bought a V8 instead of the imported P.O.S four cylinder."

Looking down at the unconscious robber, Xander popped his trunk and got out ropes to tie him up with. When he was done he called the house to have one of the girls come out to retrieve his weapons from his trunk and then called the police. He sat down on the hood of the car drinking one of the miraculously still intact V8 bottles.


End file.
